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Half Assed Irish Stuff for St. Patrick’s Day

So yeah – I’ve become painfully aware that I’m laming out and basically only doing blog posts on the major holidays here – like Valentine’s Day and that holiday where we all roll around on the floor with our dresses tucked into our pantyhose.

So I’ll continue with my new tradition of lameness and post some gifs I made (for tumblr btw but they wouldn’t upload cause of whatever the hell tumblr) of that Spike bulldog guy with the Irish accent who’s always trying to foil Droopy Dog.

These are from the cartoon Mutts About Racing where Spike and Droopy Dog are in a driving contest and of course Spike thinks he’s winning so he stops off for a pile of burgers.  And you can see the hilarity that ensues….

 

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And that’s about as Irish as it’s gonna get around here.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!!!!!!!

 

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The Passions of Carol’s Gruel

Alright.  Enough is enough.

I had this giant gruel extravaganza of posts lined up and all ready to go and never did them.  I got busy and blah blah whatev.  But just so I don’t have a bunch of weeping sadsacks following me around and giving me puppy dog eyes while I’m on vacation I’ll do this one giant post before the holidays happen.

I already mentioned that I’ve been obsessively watching A Christmas Carol – in all it’s zillions of incarnations ever since Halloween – and that one of my fave parts of A Christmas Carol is the gruel scene – but what you probably did NOT know is that THERE IS A PORN CHRISTMAS CAROL!!!!!!!!!!

Yes people.  Christmas, Ghosts, Carol and Porn all rolled into one giant ball of weirdness.  The only thing it does NOT have, however, is gruel.  ARGH!!!  I swear to god someday I’m gonna make my own gruel and jello salad oriented porno for me and folks exactly like me in every way.  Someday….

Anyway – what I’m a gonna do here is run through the highlights of The Passions of Carol – cause it’s a little different than the original story (heh) – and I’m going to intersperse that with my gruel gifs from some of the other versions of A Christmas Carol.

Be warned though that the copy of The Passions of Carol I was able to get my hands on is pretty sub par – but beggars can’t be choosers.  And for you folks with slow iphones (you know who you are) this is a gif heavy post.  Just fyi.

Are you ready???!??!?!?  Oh god I am so ready.

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So basically we start off with Carol who owns her own nudie dude mag and because of a very sad photoset of all limp dicked models

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she makes her assistant, Bob Hatchet, stay late on Christmas Eve to fix the limp dicks.

Here he is toiling away over his limp dick layout…

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and apparently all he needs to fix the limp dicks is a pencil (#1 rule of porno watching – do not question anything)

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GRUEL INTERMISSION

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A Christmas Carol (1969)

Eventually Bob Hatchet goes home to his wife – who apparently uses crutches…

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and they fuck in front of the tree

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Very festive!

GRUEL INTERMISSION #2

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A Christmas Carol (1984) w/ George C. Scott

And while all the xmas fucking is going on – over at Carol’s house, the ghost of Marley shows up…

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and goes downtown on her for a bit

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Then the ghost of christmas past shows up.

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GRUEL INTERMISSION

A Christmas Carol (1971) w/ Alistair Sim
A Christmas Carol (1971) w/ Alistair Sim

The ghost of Christmas past takes her back to the time when she was a little girl

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and orders her friends to strip and fuck (remember, do not question the porn)

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There’s a nice bj with snow in the window shot in this scene….

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Makes you feel all nice and cozy, doesn’t it.

GRUEL INTERMISSION

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A Christmas Carol (1977) with Michael Hordern

The entire “children fucking” segment is done with Ring Christmas Bells playing with single shots punctuating very odd sex moments.

There is a series of shots of some Raggedy Ann and Andy wall art and a naked lady chair…

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GRUEL INTERMISSION

Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol
Mr. Magoo’s Christmas Carol

There is also a doll that plays a big part in this scene…

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but where could her arm be????

Oh!! There it is!

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Then the ghost of Christmas present shows up

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This is actually when we see the whole Bob Hatchet and his wife fucking scene (I jumped the gun a bit on that one).

GRUEL INTERMISSION

2013 A Christmas Carol that won't be avail in the US till next year!  argh!
2013 A Christmas Carol that won’t be avail in the US till next year! argh!

Then the ghost of Christmas future comes and shows Carol what will happen to her if she keeps up her current lifestyle.

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She’ll become a cheap ho with a fro…

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who washes her customer’s dicks in the hotel sink.

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Oh hell no!!!

She wakes up and goes to her roof and makes a speech about how she is going to change

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And she hugs herself cause of all her newfound love of life and all that.  And that’s the end.

MORE GRUEL

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Scrooge (1970) with Albert Finney

and more eating of other stuffs…

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Num!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!!!!!!!

Nighty Night…

…or a super creepy good morning, as the case may be.

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necromancy

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Bat Pussy

part of a series of eerie stereoviews - dated 1923

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via Bea Arthur Baracus

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Thriller: Knock 312

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via Astro Devil

 

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via hollyhocks and tulips

 

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Sex Psycho

 

Sleep tight

 

Spooky Graveyards…with Creepy houses…and Other Stuffs…

 

But mostly graveyards.  There’s not a whole lot that geeks me out quite as much…

 

 

 

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via Astro Devil

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via THE HORRORS OF IT ALL

 

 

Lilith Aquino

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via Swamp Thingy

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via Zombie Pussy Liquor

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via Astro Devil

 

 

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via me!

 

Satan’s Triangle…you know what part!

Satan’s Triangle moment of mother flipping terror.

I posted the shorter/smaller version of this on tumblr but here’s the longer, more full bodied version for anyone who missed it and wanted to crap their pants for the rest of the day.

 

 

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Yeesh

A Little Jack o Lantern Action…

Just some nifty jack o lantern images to make you really really happy!  Oh wait – that’s what they do for me.

Hopefully they’ll at least make you smile today  😀

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Screen Shot 2013-10-09 at 4.19.23 PM

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via Collecting Candy

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via megatrip

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Pumpkinhead Scarecrow or Pumpkinhead, Scarecrow

Pumpkinheads and scarecrows and scarecrow pumpkinheads.

And I’m not talking about jack o lanterns here.  Thats different.

 

 

 

See this is a scarecrow with a jack o lantern…

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 And this is a pumkinhead scarecrow…

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Pumpkinhead…

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Pumpkinhead…

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Scarecrow…

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Pumpkinhead…

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via and everything else too

Pumpkinhead scarecrow…

1391484_10151915508591163_1785989378_n Pumpkinhead…

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via and everything else too

Pumpkinhead…

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Pumpkinhead…

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Scarecrow…

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via and everything else too (and me!)

Pumpkinhead…

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Pumpkinhead scarecrow…

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via Fifty Years Too Late

Pumpkinhead…

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via design destroy

Pumpkinhead…

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Pumpkinhead…

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 Pumpkinhead…

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 Pumpkinhead scarecrow…

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 Scarecrow…

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 Scarecrow…

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Pumpkinhead…

popeye-5 Pumpkinhead scarecrow…

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 Pumpkinhead!

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Yay!!!!

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via halloween and horror

Frankenstein Doing a Bunch of Weird Stuff

I like Frankenstein.  He’s pretty ok for a monster.  Not my all time fave – but he’s ok.  He scared the crap out of me when I was a kid and even though I got the preventative mom’s-hand-over-the-eyes treatment while watching a Frankenstein movie I truly believed for a long time that he was gonna crawl out from under my dresser after everyone (but me) was asleep.

What I’ve got here are a bunch of pics of Frankenstein doing a bunch of weird shit.  I just thought I’d share them with you.

Here he is hangin’ loose with a cat in a robe…

cruising around on a tractor…

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being a girl and a doll simultaneously…

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getting konked on the head by a safari enthusiast…

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getting some action from a plastic love doll…

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looking all super old n’ shit….

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being all teeny and cute…

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being all teeny and cute and smoking some Pall Malls…

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takin’ out the trash…

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whatever’s going on here…

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checking out this chick’s butt…

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being a chick and making a salad…

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via and everything else too

 

as well as whatever’s going on here…

 

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🙂

Extra Bonus Material….

This has nothing to do with Frankenstein – I just can’t get them to work on my tumblr blog – so I’m posting some Phyllis Diller meets the Scooby Doo gang gifs here and now.

Here she is holding a banana…

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and here she is holding another a banana….

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Oh and here we are back with Frankenstein doing some more weird shit…

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Well, that about covers it for Frankenstein.

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The Legend of Sleepy Hollow 1973

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Watch the whole thing on youtube HERE

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